This is the time of year when many of us start judging ourselves and finding fault. We make plans for the coming year that often include what we will take away from ourselves.
I will not eat dessert.
I will not eat chips.
Bread is evil.
Often, we stick with this for a few days or weeks before the “forbidden” items start creeping back in. We feel bad. We skip meals to “make up” for our lapses. We crunch down that whole bag of chips because “f-it, I failed anyway”. What if instead of focusing on what we will take from ourselves, we focus on giving ourselves MORE?
I will give myself MORE vegetables and have them at each meal.
I will give myself MORE headspace and take a ten-minute break each day.
I will give myself MORE hydration and focus on getting half my weight in ounces of water each day.
Keep it simple. Pick one thing you need more of and commit to giving it to yourself all month. Once it stops feeling like work, add another. You might only add something new once a month or every other month. The number doesn’t matter. It will add up. Turning your focus to MORE instead of LESS will help keep those feelings of deprivation and failure away.
Some of these may take practice. You have a lot of time invested in telling yourself that there isn’t time to worry about giving yourself what you need, and you may find yourself resisting. That won't go away overnight but it isn't a failure. Keep experimenting. You may have to try several options before you find, for example, a way to add veggies to your breakfast that works for you.
Make it your goal though to focus on getting in your MORE before anything else. Imagine how you might feel if you actually gave yourself what you needed instead of worrying about what to take away.